You Can't Save Me ((Yugo,Mature))

"Well...I can understand your point of view." Shen whispered. As Kate pulled her hand away, Shen's hands came to rest in his lap. He knew all this was especially hard on her considering the kind of life she had led. Knowing that...made it even harder for Shen to hate her. Sighing, Shen closed his eyes tightly and leaned back a bit. "I dont know what I want. No..actually I partly do. I know that I want Ceres to be happy. I'm just not sure if she can have that happiness with us living close to one another. At the same time...I'm not sure if moving to California will bring her happiness either. Himiko.." Shen paused and shook his head lightly. "She helped me allot while you were...gone. I dont know what to make of these missed calls...but putting that aside, in her own way...she really did help me. Still, there's just no way I can ask her to take part in Ceres' upbringings. She's...just not a baby person. I also have no real reason to move all the way to Cali..."

Kathrine hid her face against her arms as he turned to put Ceres into her crib. She flinched when he took her hand and blinked, looking up at him as she slowly slinked out of the closet and sat on the bed. She put her free hand on her lap as she rubbed her knee's together her bangs covering her eyes as she looked off to the side, away from him. "It's not...your fault..." She said quietly, she froze as she felt his fingers entwine with hers. She turned her head and looked down at their hands together. She lightly squeezed his hand before pulling hers away. She didnt want to feed herself false hope into something she was sure would never happen now. "I just...it's hard...being the bad guy....I know....I did horrible things to you...I dont blame you for hating me...it's just...its difficult to adjust to...when the people you grew up with always treated me like the bad guy...and then finding someone who show's you that you arent...that it was them who were bad....only to wake up one morning...and find out...the one who you helped you out of the darkness...is looking at you like...they did...the bad guy..." She said softly

It took Shen a while to think back to how Kate use to be. As she began to explain, although a little vague, Shen began to see why she was hiding in the closet. "Just a moment." he whispered while turning to place Ceres into her crib. Once he made sure that the baby was still asleep Shen turned back around and pulled Kate up off the closet floor. He walked her over to the bed and sat down next to her. "Listen...I'm sorry...with how things went after dinner. I dont want you to think that you have to do stuff like...this when things aren't going well tho." Shen replied softly. He was still holding her hand, his fingers interlaced with her own as he spoke. "Right now...everything is just really complicated."

Lobo looked up at Shen and whimpered running into the room when he opened the door. The wolf sniffed and went right to the closet door. When Shen opened that, Lobo started licking as Kate's hands, nuzzling his nose to her face to lick. Kathrine sniffed and tried to wipe the tears from her eyes without him noticing. "Escaping..." She muttered softly. "Its stupid...but...doing this always helped me feel a tiny bit better before...so..." She trailed off. He didnt seem to understand that all the memories of her abusive sexual crazed uncle and town was very much frsh in her memory, being wanted but hated by everyone in that town...now being somewhere where she doesnt know anyone, and still being hated and not trusted...it all the swirled around her non stop

The sound of Lobo's scratching brought Shen back from the world of sleep he'd almost entered. He loved over his shoulder towards the hall and cursed mentally. Luckily, Ceres was still out. He very slowly rose to his feet with her in his arms. "What are you doing?" Shen asked as he walked up to Kate's door. He opened it, allowing the wolf inside. Half curious, Shen entered, but found Kate's bed empty. The only place she could have been..no..Shen blinked and opened the closet door. Sure enough, there he found Kate. This was knew. He had never known her to hide in the closet for any reason. "W-What are you doing?"

Lobo stayed outside Kate's door scratching at it. The wolf was getting so desprate he started to dig into the wooden floor, causing loud scratching noises to echo through the house. Kate stayed in the closet. She hadnt found sleep. She found a slight comfort in the darkness alone....she often did this at home when her uncle and her life would push her too far. She'd lock herself away in her closet...and let out all her frustrations into a blanket or pillow

The night had been a long one. It took forever to put Ceres to bed. Himiko had given up trying to help and simply laid silently on the bed. Shen had walked all over the cabin trying to get Ceres to stop fussing. It was around three in the morning when Ceres finally went to sleep. Shen was exhausted. He moved over towards the lazy boy and sat down while holding Ceres. He wondered if he could handle working and putting Ceres to sleep every night from now on. Himiko wouldn't be any help, that much he knew for sure.

Kate had shut Lobo out of her room. The wolf was scratching and whining at her door. Kate grabbed the blanket from the bed and opened the closet door, shutting herself inside of it and wrapping the blanket around her. It had been awhile in her mind set since she last done this. Going through the shit she's gone through with her uncle...after a point you learn to make yourself numb to avoid the pain...but no matter what...their are always moments of clarity...when everything strikes you all at once. She sat on the floor of her closet, wrapped in her blanket and cried softly into the blanket

Shen wasn't sure what to say. He stared down at Kate in silence. As lightning lit up the sky once more he glanced up. He understood, but was there anything that could be done? He and Kate couldn't exactly start over. Sighing, Shen rushed back inside. He headed directly back to his room where he found Himiko going crazy. Ceres' crying had gotten worse, probably because she had been left alone with Himiko. "Give her to me." Shen sighed. Himiko quickly nodded. She and babies just didn't get along.

Kathrine hadnt heard Shen the first time. The time her yelled she looked up at him with soft hues. "Its funny...how nature can sometimes display exactly what your feeling on the inside...its almost beautiful" She said while looking out at the stormy winds, pushing at the trees making them creek and groan. She slowly stood up and walked pass him without another word. Lobo whimpered and followed after her. She walked into the cabin and headed back toward her room

Shen's head turned towards the window. Great...he had just gotten Ceres to settle down a little and now a storm was coming. "Hey..is Kate still outside?" Shen asked. "I dont know...does it matter?" Himiko asked. Shen sighed. He placed Ceres down in the middle of the bed and rose to his feet. "Watch her." he ordered. "Wait..where are you going??" she asked. Shen turned once he was at the door. "She's my mother's child. I dont want her dead. Besides, she shouldn't be out in the rain with her stitches." he stated. When shen got outside, he spotted Kate and ran over to her. "Hey, come inside before it starts raining." he told her, tho she seemed completely out of it. "KATE!" shen yelled to get her attention.

Kathrine sat on the bench at the end of the dock and stared out at the lake. She couldnt understand any of it...how the hell could Shen question her actions like that....Jake came back inside and went to his room without a word. Lobo took the chance to run out to the dock with Kate. As time passed Ceres's crying eased but she remained completely fussy, not finding anything Shen was doing to be satisfying. The sky started to get dark quickly as the wind started to pick up

Out by the lake Lobo was whining looking at the sky then to Kate then back to the cabin. he could sense the storm coming in but Kate didnt seem worried...She leaned back against the bench and pet Lobo's head to calm him down a little but he still whimpered and whined as Thunder cracked across the sky, just after a blinding bolt of lightning lit the sky up

Shen changed holding positions with Ceres. He had her laying on his shoulder now as he paced around the room. He knew babies were sensitive to tension so he was trying to erase the tension within his body. He spoke in a calm soothing voice and had Himiko do the same. "She's not stopping..." Himiko whispered as she covered her ears. "Can you blame her? She's scared and probably agitated." Shen explained. "We'll just have to deal with it. You can leave if you want." Shen stated. Himiko would have loved to leave, but she needed to stay. She had to show shen that she was with him.

Kathrine's hues widened as Shen refused her, her child. "Why would you ask me something like that, where do I even have to go" she said. As Shen refused to hand the wailing child back to her she clenched her fists. She turned and glared at Jake. "Stop protecting me!" She growled and walked out the door. "Kate, stop!" Jake yelled as he ran after her out the door. "Kate, you cant be walking that fast!" Jake scolded as he grabbed her wrist. Kathrine turned and punched him hard in the face sending him onto his ass. "By the sounds of everything, all this is your fucking fault! Stay away from me!" She yelled and walked out to the dock. Jake sat in the dirt rubbing his jaw. Damn she had a strong punch... Ceres with Shen had still not stopped screaming and showed little to no signs of stopping

"Shut the fuck up!" Shen yelled at the same time Kate had yelled. "The only reason I haven't kicked your ass for the stunt you pulled is because of Kate. Dont push your luck tho because I've about had it with your bullshit." Shen spat. When Kate walked up to him asking for Ceres, Shen backed away holding the baby a little tighter. He just didn't know who to believe. "IF I give her to you, will you vanish again?" he asked her, his eyes narrowed sharply. Himiko turned watching the scene unfold. Her work was done. Shen gazed down at Ceres. The baby wasn't happy with so many people yelling. He rocked her gently in his arms trying to calm her. "Shhh sorry princess." he whispered softly. "I'll hold onto her. A father should spend time with his daughter...or do you not trust me?" Shen asked with a cold glare. He turned away from Kate walked towards the back where he and Himiko would be sleeping. Himiko followed. She had a hand on his shoulder as they walked.

"Not possible, I never bought liquor for the house while Kate was pregnant" Jacob mentioned, just throwing in the truth when needed. "How much pain she's cause him? If he's been tormented by her disapperence then he finally understands what she went through. Yes its tough, yes its unfair, but now he's where Kate was. So personally I say that should make them even." Jake said. "Shut up" Kate yelled at Jake. "I dont need you defending me!" She yelled, being the stubborn girl Shen had first met. Refusing to take help, even when it really did help her. "It's none of your concern so drop it" She growled at Jake. She slowly walked up to shen and held her hands out. "I'd like to take Ceres into my room please" She said firmly

Shen's eyes went wide. Now nothing made sense. Calls...twice a month? Himiko mentally cursed. She should have done a better job at covering the calls up. "So..what are you trying to say exactly?" she asked, tho as Ceres began to cry she handed the baby back to Shen. "Shen, didn't you tell me that Kate had issues with drinking? How much do you wanna bet that in one of her drunken rages she tried calling but couldn't? I mean, how would this Kate know for sure? Her memory been wiped clean. She's confused." Himiko stated. Shen shifted his eyes between the girls. He didn't know who, or what to believe. "Listen..enough of this. What happened in the past no longer matters." he stated as he rocked Ceres back and forth. "It does matter." Himiko frowned. "She has no idea how much pain she caused. She has no idea how I've struggled to help you deal with the pain. If you ask me..." Himiko paused as she shifted her icy gaze back over to Kate. "The little cunt cant be trusted. She's sweet now, but how long will it last?"

Kate didnt judge Shen. She shook her head and just said "I know" but when Himiko chimed in Kathrine's hues narrowed. "Yes, as far as I've been told that is why I've come out here, but after he told me that I only called him after Ceres was born I went looking through my phone, I wasnt convinced...and I found something interesting. I've been calling Shen twice a month for the last 7 months, once every 1st and every 15th..." she said while crossing her arms. "I dont understand how on my call log it shows the dialed calls, and yet Shen told me he never got a single one until Ceres was born" Kathrine said. Ceres started to cry again when Himiko stood suddenly the baby wailed

Shen's eyes filled with rage. He stared at Himiko for a good five minutes. Himiko couldn't say much, not with the way shen was looking at her. Surprisingly, Shen kept his cool even tho he wanted to scream at Himiko. "Listen Kate...about that." Shen muttered as he rose to his feet. "I've been meaning to discuss the move with you." he stated. "Whats to discuss?" Himiko asked while standing up with Ceres still in her arms. "You came all the way out here to get away from Shen right? You kept him in the dark and called 'after' his baby had been born. You were gonna give her up right? I'd say everything is working out. Shen and I will take 'Ceres' to Cali and you can stay here or wherever with your mut."

Kathrine glanced over. "I plan on keeping him. City people are ignorant. I can say he's a malamute husky mix and they'll believe it" She said. "But you wont have to worry, I mean you said your moving to Cali right? Lobo will be a great watch dog for my and Ceres" Kathrine said bluntly. The only way what so ever that Kate would or could know about california was if Shen or Himiko told her and Shen hadnt said a word....

Shen's gaze shifted over towards the kitchen. Before he could lecture Kate Jacob had beat him to the punch. His eyes shifted back to Ceres, who had calmed down. Shen decided to give Himiko another try at holding. "Just be gentle." he told her. Himiko nodded, tho her eyes glanced over at Lobo. "Does the beast have to sit right in front of me. I feel like he'll attack at any moment." Himiko frowned as Ceres was placed into his arms. "Well...I dont approve...but what do you want me to do?" he asked. Himiko shook her head. "Hey Kate, what are you gonna do with this thing when we head back to New York?"

As Himiko paniced Lobo caught on to that sense of fear and he stood up and barked nervously for Ceres until Shen was holding her again. Kathrine finished her burger and soda and put the plate in the sink turning on the water and slowly started to do the dishes in the sink, when she wasnt really suppose to be. She winced lightly as she reached over a little to grab the silver wear in the sink. Jacob walked in from the lake and into the kitchen. "Hey hey, your not suppose to be doing that" Jake said and walked up behind her and shut off the water. "Sit down, I got it" He said while putting a bucket down on the kitchen floor. In the bucket was a line filled with fish attatched together. "Oh wow did you just catch all those?" She asked while looking in the bucket

"W-What she's doing?!" Himiko panicked. Shen shook his head. He took Ceres back and gently rocked her in his arms until she calmed down. "Himiko, I know you're a doctor but that doesn't mean you know what to do with a baby. You have to be gentle. They spook very easily. They cant voice their dislikes so they cry...loudly." Shen explained. Himiko leaned forward nodding. "I'll...get better. I'm just not use to...you know." she whispered. Shen nodded. "I understand...and I understand all of this was unexpected. As long as you try tho...thats all I'll ask." he replied softly. Himiko nodded and scooted closer. Once Ceres had stopped crying she'd try holding her again.

Kathrine rolled her eyes, and she in all honestly didnt like Himiko handling her daughter, but Shen was right next to her so hopefully it would be fine. Lobo however whined and laid on the floor with a low growl, staring at Himiko with the baby. Ceres started to fuss almost instantly and as Himiko nuzzled into her face Ceres started to cry loudly.

"I'm not afraid. I'm a doctor too ya know!" Himiko frowned as she moved closer to Shen and stretched her arms out. "Here, give me little Paris." she stated. "Ceres." Shen frowned. "Right." Himiko smiled. Sighing, Shen placed his daughter into Himiko's arms. "Support her head." Shen instructed. Himiko nodded. She gazed down at the baby and felt...well...nothing really. Maybe it was because Ceres wasn't hers. Still, if she was going to get Shen to move away she'd have to learn how to be 'motherly.' "Awww aren't you a little cutie!" Himiko exclaimed while nuzzling her face into Ceres' cheek, tho a little too hard. "Easy Himiko. She's not a football." Shen frowned. "Oh relax. Little Meres loves me." she smiled brightly. "Ceres!" Shen growled. "Right..that." Himiko smiled innocently.